I WANT TO DIE

“I won’t spare him.  Sada has challenged me.  He cannot get away like this. I want to die.”

Mishra was shouting like mad.

Dr. Lele was calmly observing him as he steadied Mishra’s hand and injected him to sleep.

Mishra was the CEO of Bros International who had been admitted to J.K. Hospital as he was found to be acting very insanely over the past few days since Sada died in a tragic mishap.  The family of Mishra was deeply worried about his condition.

Dr. Lele was trying to allay their fears in vain as he was coming out of the ICU and strode towards his cabin.

A phone call interrupted Dr. Lele as he was studying the test results carried out on patient Mishra.

“Inspector Gaikwad has come to meet you Sir,” informed the nurse.

“Ok, let him in.”

In a few seconds, Inspector Gaikwad entered his cabin as he shook hands with the Doctor.  Both Lele and Gaikwad were thick friends.

“Is there any improvement in Mishra’s health,” asked the Inspector.

“No.   What happened to this Sada’s case?” asked Dr. Lele

“Well, it seems to be an unfortunate mishap, but Sada’s family is claiming that he has committed suicide.”  said Inspector Gaikwad.

“Well, interesting.  Sada’s other colleagues were busy telling that Mishra was so attached to Sada that he could not stand Sada’s death and hence, got mad” quipped Dr. Lele

“All are chamchas”  laughed Inspector Gaikwad.

Sada was the Personal Secretary to Mishra who was abusive and made Sada work for long hours.

Sada was getting increasingly frustrated by Mishra’s eccentric behavior.  These were days of recession, and he could not even afford to resign from the job as there were not much offers coming his way.

He had a five year old daughter to look after and his demanding wife, who was angry with Sada for not spending enough time with her.

The denial of even a week’s leave by his boss for going to Malppuram to perform ceremony “Vidyarambham” for his daughter proved to be the last straw for Sada.

A highly incensed Sada left his office in the afternoon itself complaining of chest pain.

Sada felt that Mishra had a pointless grudge towards him as if he and his boss were sparring partners since the last seven births.

Mishra always had his final say and was the last one to make amends with anyone.

He never would have thought that Sada could utter a word against him.

That night, when Mishra was fast asleep, his cellphone ringed continuously.  Mishra’s wife scowled at him, as he stumbled to pick the phone only to see that it was Sada on the line.

He looked at the time.

It was 1.00 am.

“What the hell are you doing talking to me at this hour?” Mishra barked.

“You bloody fool.  I am not your slave.  I will call you daily at this hour.  How can you deny my leave?” shouted Sada, in return.

Mishra was taken aback by Sada’s outburst.  Sada was never a rebellious type.  His voice was sharp and clear and he did not even appear to have been drunk.

Mishra gathered himself and shouted back, “I shall dismiss you from service, you bastard.”

Sada laughed loudly, “I challenge you that you can never take any action against me.” and disconnected.

Mishra was fuming as he tried to connect to Sada again and again.  But Sada did not respond.

“Where will he go?  I will see him tomorrow in the office.” murmured Mishra as he went back to sleep.

Next day, Sada did not turn up at office at the usual hour.  Sada was the most punctual and responsible one in the office.

Mishra had made his mind to issue dismissal orders for Sada.

There was a knock on the door of his cabin.

“Sir, there is a bad news.  Sada was run over by a train yesterday afternoon when he was crossing the tracks.” office attendant Kadam informed Mishra

“What, it cannot be possible.” shouted Mishra.

Mishra was stunned, when it was confirmed that Sada died by coming under a speeding train in the afternoon.

If Sada had died at noon time in the earlier day, how could Mishra receive phone call from Sada later at 1.00 am in the morning.

To add to his woes, Sada’s family lodged a police complaint accusing Mishra for the death of Sada, as they alleged that Sada committed suicide unable to bear the tyranny of his boss.

Meanwhile Inspector Gaikwad and Dr. Lele were discussing about Mishra’s mental condition.

Gaikwad said, “Well, I have recorded Sada’s death as a case of accident occurred while Sada was crossing the tracks.  I do not want to waste my time calling it suicide.”

“Thanks”, said Dr. Lele.

“Will Mishra recover from his state?”

“Well, I can’t say.  I have called the Psychiatrist also to examine Mishra.  I think Mishra will recover over a period of time.” said the Doctor.

“Why is Mishra swearing at the name of Sada and wishing to die”, asked the Inspector.

“Mishra is getting obsessed with the thought of punishing Sada for some reason.  Due to his mentally imbalanced state, he is wishing to die so that he can get back to Sada at heaven or hell.” said the Doctor.

Both the Doctor and the Inspector had a hearty laugh.

In the meantime, the cellphone of the Doctor accidentally kept near patient Mishra started ringing.

Mishra got awake by the noise of the cellphone and lifted the phone.  It was Sada on the line.

“What the hell are you doing talking to me at this hour?” Mishra barked.

“You bloody fool.  I am not your slave.  I will call you daily at this hour.  How can you deny my leave?” shouted Sada, in return.

Mishra gathered himself and shouted back, “I shall dismiss you from service, you bastard.”

Sada laughed loudly, “I challenge you that you can never take any action against me.” and again disconnected.

Meanwhile, Dr. Lele realized that he had forgotten to take his cellphone from the ICU and went in again to collect the same as well as check the state of health of Mishra.

To his dismay, he found Mishra’s pulse had already stopped.

पुसू नका अश्रू

दोन्ही काठाला जोडणारी नदी रुसून गेली कुठेय



उरली फक्त माती त्या मातीत बांधू घरे



या काठाला दरवाजे त्या काठाला खिडक्या



मातीत नव्हे कुंडीत वाढत आहेत झाडे




घरात वाहणारी नळात जमिनी खालून ओढलेलं पाणी नव्हे



हे तर तहाणेने तडपणारी भूमिदेवीचे अश्रू होय



पुसू नका!





                            ..... सुरेश अय्यर 

கண்ணீர்

இரு கரைகளையும் சேர்க்கும் நதி 

காணாமல் போனதே
நேற்று. 

இன்று 
இரு கரைகளை சேர்க்கும் மணல் 
வீடுகளை கட்டும் பொருளானதே 

இக்கரையில் வாசல், அக்கரையில் ஜன்னல் 
தொட்டியில் செடிகள் வளருதே.

வீட்டிற்குள் உபயோகிக்க 
நிலத்தடியிலிருந்து எடுக்கபடுகிறதே 
அது தண்ணீர் அல்ல.

தாகத்தில் தத்தளிக்கும் நம் பூமி தாயின் 
கண்ணீர் !

துடைத்துவிடாதிர்கள்


                        .......  சுரேஷ் அய்யர் 

ROCKET RAJA - A SHORT STORY

Raja was standing before a busy Railway Junction.  He was a smart young guy.  He was feeling very nervous.  His fingers were itching.  He had to do it anyway.  If he did not do it this time, he will be mocked by his group.  It was tempting, but he was feeling on the edge.  It was almost like a question of Life and Death for him.

The girl passed by him.  She was looking very pretty and was wearing a white top and blue tight fit jeans.  On the T shirt was written the words.

“Do Not Look At Me.  I Know I am Hot.”

There was a mild scent in the air as she passed him.   The sun was beginning to set and the rays made her gleam.  Too many people were proceeding towards the railway station, while some were buying fruits, napkins, books, household items across many of the stalls.  Some were just huddled in groups chit-chatting.

Raj concentrated on the girl.  He did not know what fate lay in store for him this time.  The first time, he did it; he was chased by the crowd.  The second time, he was almost beaten up but rescued by his companions. 

“Dey, Indha dhadavai miss pannadharaa” shouted one of his companions. (Don’t miss this time).  He could see a group of eve-teasers on the other side of the road.  They whistled at the girl as she moved past them.  Nothing could distract him this time.  He was determined.  Millions of emotions raced through his small mind.

The girl was dodging smartly between the crowd and the roadside hawkers.  His legs were moving swiftly behind the girl and in no time, he came shoulder to shoulder with her.  He gently brushed on her arms and his fingers felt her butt.  The girl did not even have an inkling of his intentions.  He zipped past swiftly and got lost on the crowd.  His face was beaming with pride as he approached his group of companions who watched him with a gasp.  They stood scattered near the staircase of the station. 

What started as a temptation became a habit for him.  He swiftly climbed the stairs and brushed past five in the crowd. 

……………….

This time, they were men, some middle-aged and some young.  It was even better this time. 

Soon it was night.  They sat on the first floor of an under-construction flat.  As one of them removed his pack of cards, the other one remarked “Hey Raja, take the booty out.”  Raja spreads open his bag and dropped the wallets on the floor.  All of them started counting.  They collected coolly a sum of Rs.7,500/-.  They distributed Rs.1400/- among themselves and gave Rs.1900/- to Raja as a reward for his exploits. 

A few credit cards too lay on the floor alongwith a hi-tech mobile phone. 

Raja was a confident young man now.  His fingers worked in a smooth precision with a hidden blade in between.  They zipped into the pockets of unsuspecting men and women like a rocket and came out like lightning.  He became increasingly popular in his group. 

No one calls him Raja anymore.  They call him “Rocket Raja”.

 
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FEARLESS MUMBAIKARS KEEP THE CITY TICKING

I happened to be in the local train at Dadar Railway Station on 13 July, 2011 just when the blasts shook a few meters outside the Station.  I came to know of this when I reached Ghatkopar, as I was called from my office colleague enquiring about my location.  Memories of previous bomb blasts and attacks on Mumbai haunted like a recap to my mind.  I thought it may be some other instance of serial attack on local trains or markets in Mumbai.  I heaved a sigh of relief that I was safe and was feeling equally guilty about this feeling.  As I reached Dombivli, I came to know of the exact news.  So scared was I that I rushed past the crowded station and reached home.  I felt relief to see that not much damage was done.  I may sound insensitive at this point, but only a Mumbaikar will understand the crazy pangs faced by him or her after each time, such an attack takes place.

I remember my engagement date which was one day before the August 25, 2003 bomb blasts at Gateway of India.  I used to have a stroll at the Gateway of India quite near my office near my lunch hours.  My first call came from my fiancée then, now my wife that whether I was safe.  This was our first conversation after our engagement.  Fortunately, I did not go to office that day, as I was in Kalyan for filing my Income Tax Returns.

It reminded me of the14 Mar 2003 Mulund blast.  At least ten commuters, including four women, were killed and 70 injured in an explosion near the first class ladies compartment of a local train in Mumbai.  The incident occurred when the train was entered Mulund station around 2045 IST on Thursday.  I happened to be in the train right behind the attacked train and was not even aware when the incident happened, as my train passed through Mulund.  It was only after I reached Thane that I got the news and managed to reach home after a very scary moment in the train.

The 11 July 2006 Mumbai train bombings were a series of seven bomb blasts that took place over a period of 11 minutes on the Suburban Railway in Mumbai, capital city of the Indian state of Maharashtra and the nation's financial capital.  It was evening time past 18.00 hrs.  I came to know of this around 19.00 hrs when my train was crossing Dadar.  People around were talking of the serial blasts like a running commentary.  Some were gossiping, some were shouting, some were laughing but deep within all of them including me, there was a lurking fear that some bomb may explode from under our seats leaving our life to nothing.  I thought about my parents, my dear wife and prayed all along that nothing should happen to this train.  It is easy writing a blog in a secure environment and expressing bravado.  But at such times of distress, when we are involved in the thick of things, we fear for our life.  We call our friends, relatives, neighbors, check whether all are safe and try to rest in peace.

During the month of November, 2008, I always came home by the 21.30 Dombivli semi-fast local from CST due to work pressure.  It was sheer coincidence that on November 26, 2008, I felt very tired in office and decided to leave immediately after 1800 hrs only to know later that there was a terror attack in CST Railway Station at around the same time when I took the Dombivli local for home.  The action then shifted to the Taj right behind a few meters from our office.  We were scared and I did not go to office the next day too.

The disturbing fact I wish to convey through my above experiences is that people in Mumbai have begun to use the date of bomb blasts as a reference point for some occasion. 

During this bomb blast, I was here.  During that bomb blast, I was there.

 The only consolation was that locals and buses plied on time during such emergencies and people kept moving to prevent commotion.  Chest beating and angry outbursts look good only in movies, but when you encounter an unknown enemy, it is better to behave in a sane manner. 

In that context, I find the people of Mumbai to be the most fearless and warm amongst all the cities in India.  People who come from outside India are the best judge as they testify to this fact that Mumbai embraces all people with generosity unparalleled.  The attacks on North Indians and solitary instances of harassment are breaking news only in the media, but everyone feels safe and secure in the city as the community stands more and more united with each passing attack.  The Zaveri Bazar, where places of worship of various faiths co-exist is the best example to this fact.  Despite being prone to multiple attacks, communities in Zaveri Bazaar never doubted each other and stay united.  People have become more vigilant and equally united.  It is only in the world outside that people wedge enmity and look at these attacks through the narrow confines of religion. 

Life moves in Mumbai not because they are insensitive but we have to earn our daily bread and butter.  Day before yesterday, when I was in my usual morning commute reading a Marathi Novel in a densely crowded train, a middle-aged man standing right next to me collapsed suddenly and fell down.  People around suddenly rushed and made him get up.   Those who were sitting vacated their seats and made way for him to sit and offered him water.  It put a smile in my face that everything is right in Mumbai.  Mumbai may appear tough in the exterior but deep inside it is very sensitive and kind.

IS DEATH A NUMBER?

One, two, three, four

Count the numbers

Hated this maths as a kid

Thrust on us by God knows who

Is life a number?

One, two, three, four

Count the numbers

Bullets spray around

Bombs blast around

Who allows these numbers?

One, two, three, four

Count the numbers

Hundreds dead

Thousands injured

Why make us count these numbers?

One, two, three, four

Count the numbers

Survivors are fortunate numbers

The Dead are the forgotten numbers

Ain’t we sick of these numbers?

One, two, three, four

Count the numbers

Religions created for love

Targeted for hate

Do we really need these spiritual numbers?

One, two, three, four

Animals can’t count

Only a man can

Why not be back to the primitive ages

Do we need these numbers?

One, two, three four

Count the numbers

Hate this maths even now

Thrust on us by God knows who

Is death a number?

---- Suresh M Iyer

THE ROOT CAUSE OF TERRORISM IN INDIA

It is a bit unfortunate that we as a country are facing hostilities from our neighboring countries since independence.  Pakistan since its creation has always harbored terrorist elements against India with an intention to destabilize our country.  China the Big Brother supports Pakistan in their endeavor to divide India.  We face threats from Bangladesh and from Sri Lanka in the South.  Since we have open borders with Nepal, terrorists use Nepal as easy entry and exit points.  Our borders with Pakistan and Bangladesh are porous and not fully sealed.  We face trouble on the North -East side with China claiming Arunachal Pradesh.  These countries hobnob with these terrorists and have helped them to establish their bases from where they can carry out their evil acts.  So, all the expertise for planting Bombs on soft targets comes from these countries.  But not everything can be done from these foreign bases.  So they take advantage of the unemployed youth and others who fall easy prey to their indoctrination and create local groups who forment trouble in all cities across India.  While many of the educated youth associated with fields like IT openly take part in aiding terrorist activities, it is the uneducated and poor who are always at the front of such battles.  Elite people among the terrorists never become human bombs.  They hide themselves in safe comforts and incite the less privileged to carry out evil acts in the name of jihad.  They take help from some political class and the corrupt officials provide fodder for their entry and exit from India.

So Terrorism is not about Muslims only and their quest for Jihad. Not all Muslims are terrorists and not all terrorists are Muslims.  India's 140 million Muslims are a salutary negation of the facile thesis about Islam's incompatibility with democracy. The terrorists that we encounter today are not men who commit evil acts out of revenge.  For these men indoctrinated by outfits like the Al Qaeda and the Dawood gangs, terrorism is a full fledged profession.  The cold blooded killers associated with the serial blasts in and around Dadar today went about with their tasks with clinical precision. They did it because it was a job they wanted to do.  Only few Muslims believe that these phonies are fighting for any cause but their own.  Hindus have stopped fulminating against terror despite the heavy toll it takes each time.  For these terrorists who are invisible, they have no Agenda.  They do it in the name of Jihad or some linguistic or religious cause, which a common man does not identify himself with.   

India earned its reputation as a soft state that can be intimidated into meeting terrorists' demands.  Our then foreign minister in the year 1999 in the month of December personally escorted three terrorists freed by India in order to secure the release of passengers of a hijacked Indian Airlines flight to Taliban controlled Afghanistan.  This act led to the 9/11 attack in New York as one of these very terrorists was later implicated in the 9/11 attacks.  Tough rhetoric and reactive government policies and Draconian acts like the POTA will not serve the cause for curbing such terrorism.  It will only result in violation of human rights and engineer more youth to fall prey to such terrorist organizations.  We have to break out of this trap that we have imposed on ourselves.   

Democratic politics, political freedoms, civil liberties and religious tolerance must be protected at all costs.  The corruption and politicization of the police forces must be minimized.  We need a dedicated and an unbiased police force.  Criminalization of politics and funding for elections must stop.  Instead, we have number of parliamentarians with pending criminal cases.  Some jailed parliamentarians also cast their vote on important National issues which is alarming!  Lack of accountability and Corruption, act as a fodder for these terrorists in many ways.  Terrorism prospers and thrives in such conditions. In a way, Poverty is an incubator of terrorism and a root cause of corruption.  It breeds the Naxalites and the local terrorist groups.   The government needs to be tough in implementing reforms to maintain rapid economic growth and uplift the status of its downtrodden people.

More importantly, India's terrorism problem is largely specific to Kashmir.  There is a difference between terrorists and freedom fighters and one should not equate them.  India must muster International support in this issue and put pressure on Pakistan to stop supporting these terrorists.  India habitually points fingers at Pakistan which is the hotbed and the epicentre of terrorism all around the world.  But merely pointing fingers will not help matters.  For a small country like Pakistan to be able to infiltrate groups of Indians and recruit them to the terrorist's cause indicates failures of the intelligence on the other hand.  We have to look into this fact.  There is no co-ordination between the central intelligence agencies and the states.  Each points a finger at others each time a bomb blast takes place.  This is matched by the flaws of the criminal justice system, which is rudimentary by the standards of mature democracies.  Whether it is the Bombay bomb blasts of 1992 or the Gujarat riots in 2002, justice takes many years to deliver.  Justice has neither been done, nor seen to be done.  India needs to be tough but not reactionary to the causes of terrorism.  Its high time, we learn the lessons and rise over petty politics for the sake of our nation.

AM I THE DIGITAL KING?

Like a spider I weave my web to live

My day begins with login

Ends with logoff

Password activates my soul, brings it alive

Find peace with friends’ online, offline

Chatting, sending messages of mine

Logging me in different roles

Find company in many, love in few

Web is my kingdom

Live like a king with many wives

Free to befriend those who love

Free to shun those who hate

Is web my prey or am I its victim?

Deeply embedded in this web of mine

I dread the day, everything goes offline

To be declared dead before am actually dead.

MURDERING HER WAY TO STARDOM - MARIA SUSAIRAJ

MURDERING HER WAY TO STARDOM – MARIA SUSAIRAJ

The Maria Susairaj case has caught the eye of the entire nation.  The Police have again showed its weaknesses not being able to present evidence in a scientific way, leading to botching up of the case.  As a result, a gruesome murder of a young man, Neeraj Grover turned out to be just a simple case of culpable homicide not amounting to murder.  

The murder of Neeraj Grover is a perfect example of the degeneration of the values in our society.  Neeraj Grover was a successful person in the field of Entertainment at an young age of around 26.  Emile Jerome was a bright student, who scored over 90% in SSC and HSC and was a bright prospect in Navy.  It was Maria Susairaj, who was a struggling actor and wanted to make a mark in the film world.  All three persons were sane, educated and mature individuals who could take their own decisions.  Maria thought Neeraj would help in reviving her film career, but that did not work out.  In a way, she put herself in a situation that called for Emile Jerome, her lover to kill Neeraj. 

The manner, in which they conspired to destroy evidence, indicates the working of a criminal mind.  I would like to ask a simple question – Even if you are in a fit of anger, normally sane persons do not go out to kill others.  If it were to happen, we could have seen murders in every next house.  Even if a murder happens by impulse, the natural reaction is fear.  The sight of a dead body with blood and gore puts off such persons.  But here, Emile and Maria did everything they could to dispose off the body and destroy evidence in a professional manner like a hardcore criminal.  

It is another matter that the Police botched up the case by not carrying out a scientific investigation.  Logically, Maria Susairaj played the victim card and proved that she is a fine actress in real life too.  Being a woman and playing the role of a victim, certainly helped Maria.  Emile Jerome came all the way to kill Neeraj to save his damsel in distress and finds him in jail for another seven years.  Look at the irony.  It was Maria Susairaj at the scene of crime before the murder, during the murder and after the murder.  She took active complicity in the destruction of evidence, for which the court convicted her for a 3 year jail sentence.  But she comes out like an acquitted person, with a free ticket to Stardom. 

So, Maria Susairaj was the ultimate beneficiary of this whole case.  Three years in jail seems to be a three year probation for impending star status for Maria, now that Ram Gopal Verma has already declared that he is going to star Maria Susairaj in his next film. 

I respect the court verdict.  The courts can give verdict, only on judging the evidences present before them.  I am not confident that the higher courts could be changing the decision of the lower court, because the same evidence is going to be presented before the higher courts by the prosecution.  Unfortunately, there are several poor undertrials who have committed offences of a lesser nature, than the above but are rotting in jail, as they cannot afford a good lawyer.  Gone are the days, when a mere visit to Police Station would raise eyebrows.  Nowadays, if you are able to market yourself well, a jail term can turn out to be a bonus also.

But Maria who was on a tour to Church, Siddhivinayak Temple and Dargah and celebrating her release from jail, would certainly know what the truth behind this is.  Her conscience will prick her throughout the life.  Nowadays, who has conscience?  I could see only thugs and hardcore criminals going to Siddhivinayak Temple nowadays.  It seems even the Gods have their eyes closed.  What was Maria Susairaj trying to portray, when she called a Media Conference.  Did she expect the people to shower bouquets on her and laud her for her release from jail ? We already had a convicted criminal Sanjay Dutt, endorsing Gandhian values via his film Munnabhai.  Now, we may see another convicted accused Maria Susairaj playing Mother Teresa.  Am I Being Too Human?